I am celebrating my 2nd anniversary with my boyfriend in the month of September. Knowing that we have been through the high's and low's, but the fact is after all this I am feeling drown.
He is 36 in December. He lives with his older gay brother, who happens to be a pain in the ass to me. Only recently that he aknowledge my presence in my bf's life. The pressure I get from his family alone is big enough. His sister expects me to be with him like forever! His father always asks about me, where am I, what I'm doing and things like that! The mom, I don't think she likes me.
He is a so-called theatre producer, and his last production was in June 2004! And what has he been doing since then? Nothing. Although he also has a small business, selling traditional anyaman baskets and boxes imported from Bali. This business is shared with his close friend, Al-pacino.
This year, he has been an angel. The UK trip was mostly thanks to his effort. He bought me gifts for my birhtday, for our anniversary, for all small occassions too.
I love him very much, but today my heart is sceptical about our future. I want to stop from all this attachment and be free once again. But I don't dare to delete the beautiful moments we shared. I'm 22, still young, still at the advantage of getting a new lover. But would I want to be a bitch and be selfish, and screw someone else life?
I have not decide on anything, but I am getting a time off from him. I have not told him directly but he knows I am having emotional problems with the relationship. He consulted me today, but I couldn't say a word out. Only a deep breathe, and smile politely to aknowledge his words.
He is in his worst period, counting all the other problems he encounters too. I am not making any decision now.
"Let love lead the way....." Spice Girls
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