The weirdest thing happened last night.

I was doing some strengthening exercise in the room, about half past midnite. Don't ask why at that hour I'm doing work out while most people are already tucked in bed. Anyway, I received an sms from my teman tapi mesra.

Early in the day, I was at Midvalley with my classmates. We were suppose to watch Die Hard 4 which didn't went as planned because the que was berserk. I don't know what the heck was going, or was it that Monday was an off day for 50% of the Klang Valley residence. So I was dejected because Bruce Willis used to be a hunk I really adored and wouldn't think twice to be his bottom! Hahaha

So we romp around the mall to window shop. Guess who I spotted from far. Kayrul. My first automatic respond was to avoid the confrontation. I was so hurt by what he has done to me the last week, so seeing him out of the blue just made things a little bit complicated.

My mind was wondering around until I received the sms from him at midnite.

He said he was terribly sorry for turning his back on me. He listened to some one who apparently was trying to write off my name of his walls. I mean, this guy was actually telling things about me which made him so confused. Secondly, this guy then uses my blog for his propaganda.

One, he has no other things to do but to sit in other people's life and ruin it.

Second, a keh-poh-chee for interffering my life.

And lastly, stupid for using my personal blog to write me off.

This guy is already known to you have read my last few posts. To make it clear, he is the one who took my ex away further from me. Period.

My last words to Kayrul on sms was, "Kalau u jumpe pukimak tu, kirim salam jahanam kat dia from me".

So I am no more the teman tapi mesra, but some sad lonely young man.

I felt so so stupid, because on Thursday and Friday I was so eager to know what had actually happened between us. He kept saying that he wanted to meet and explain on a few things, and that he needed me to tell him something which I don't know what the heck was it all about.

I sms him like a few times, with no replies. Sad. And true.

I only get replied in the evenings, and that too wasn't enough to damper the emotional beared for the day.

My weekend was kind enough to me as I solicit for space to free myself from the entangled. So, it was just lepaking and spending money in Bukit Bintang. I mean shopping is really the best medicine for this and I actually bought a few new tees and one pants. And today, I feel a bit better today.

By the way, just a twist to make my new week more enticing. I met someone yesterday evening. Apparently he saw me before, and took his biggest courage to the test and approached me. Erm, at that point I was totally in a brain dead situtation because he was so cute. I was smoking near a bin at KL Plaza's taxi stand, when he came from far approaching the stand. To que.

I thought he was really waiting for a cab. But that took like 3 or more minutes for him to ask me for a roks. I gave him my Sempoarna pack, and told him sorry I only smoke this for social purpose. He said, cool me too. I'm like, yikes!

We chatted briefly, but I wasn't sure what was going on because:
1. No bloody one ever approached me on the street before, just to smoke and chat.
2. He was kinda straight looking. And my gay radar wasn't beeping at all!

Then he broke the code. Saying, "Actually I pernah nampak u kat Laqueen dulu." My heart beat did not stopped, but popped out from my chest! (imagine like those cartoon characters do lah!) I said, "Oh ye ker" and grin. Blushing at the same time, and maintaining the macho pose. He said he wanted to know me better and asked me out for a drink if I was okay to do so. I didn't mind since I was just chilling around. But I had to break the bubble a bit, as I was actually waiting for another friend with me. So to date me I had to bring a lamp post together. He was ok with it.

The rest, you can just go figure. I just find this man, who is only a year older than me really easy going, simple, smart and at the same time witty. I'm not expecting much out of this as it's just a pure coincidence that I was there, smoking! And he was there too. Or was it because cupid has read my messages I sent to his inbox?

I think I better sent another one, not for another guy but to thank him.

Stupid.

So someone has been using my blog as a personal propaganda to make my life miserable. I don't know what the heck is this little bastard is up to but I'm not going to go eager to find out.

First of all, I know I have not committed any offence to him in the past. I was a sincere friend, eventhough some of my close friend's already reminded me before hand to be on the alert when going out with him. He has so many prawns behind the stone.

Now I know how this life can be cruel, unless we can be certain and make ourselves guarded with our mind and belief that things won't be so much affected by it. You gotta be strong in another word.

Losing a man I love, and now losing a teman tapi mesra is just enough said than done. I better move out from the circle before it's just too late.

A friend said, "It's like you're stepping on the tail end of a snake, and still wondering around it's basket". So deep, expressive but above all a thoughtful one from a caring friend.

Will leave this matter as it is for now. Hanging.

GENTLE REMINDER:

Please leave me alone.

What have I caused you until I have to bear all this unbearable cost?

Jangan jaga tepi kain orang. Please.

Thank you.

This semester, I have to readjust my plans.

It so happen that I failed a subject I really hate the most. Research in Communication. I didn't know until today that I have to repeat this subject, before I take this other part II of the same subject. And to add salt to the pain, the part I is not offered this semester so I have to wait until the next one in November.

To cut all things short, I'm extending a semester! Fork! Bangsat! Amput!

And my industrial training now has been shifted to February next year instead of November.

This semester, I'm taking 6 subjects of which 2 of it requires students to organise a seminar and an event. I like. Just my forte.

Well, I have to live with this new plan now. Sad.

Over the weekend made some little activites hanging out with friends.

First went over to a friend's book reading at Rumah Pena somewhere near Dewan Bahasa. Well at first I was not keen to go but I kinda promised my writer friend that I would come and support him. I cam half past 8, there were a few tudung girls and some old men. Konon, they were the pencinta seni yang very eager to express themselves through the writing.

The first sesssion which was about 30 minutes, featured a few writers. Well I know some of them through the blogs they have online and the one particular writer is Azwan Ismail. The only piece that got stuck into my mind until this very moment is the short poem titled Zakarku. The title itself was enough to raise your eyebrow. I was kinda impressed because in our society, we have people like this one who is able to express with not red tape or whatsoever and those who were listening perceived the writing as just a piece of expression. In plain words, Zakarku was just about the dick after some exhaleration sex. I don't know how to explain.

Nevertheless, I met some other intellectual PLU there too. Said my hello's and so forth. Afterwards went to Laqueen with Abang Shan and his adik angkat. We were just lazying on the bar, wondering and looking upon the Chinese majority. No offense, it was my wrong nite. I don't favour uncut dicks.

Sunday went to church. And the afternoon, went for the 25th anniversary celebration at a 3 star hotel in town. So a boring weekend to end my holidays, before officially entering my final semester.

With ICC Boys, Equinox

With ICC Babes, Equinox

Husband and wife, ICC Committee member

With Indonesian Cheerleading Community (ICC) Allstars Jakarta

Champion, One Cheers from SMA 1 Bandung

The Judges, Jak STUFF Cheerleading 2007, Plaza Atrium

Citoz Plaza, Jakarta South

So I'm back!

I've only one word to recap the 5 days to Jakarta: pleasant.

Nothing much was to be expected since I was driven to the max by the organiser with the event. I didn't get as much privacy which I intended to have thus leaving me out of having some quiet time of mine. All dates was either cancelled or had to be put off because of unforseen circumstance. The Thai guy left to Bali the day I arrived. The guy from G4M was tied with work. Well I was tied with the event too, so there was nothing much I could ask for.

The competition was moderate. But there were teams from 3 different district - Jakarta, Bekasi and Bandung that competed. Well it was truly an eye opener for me as I witnessed three different types of cheerleading style. The Bekasi and Bandung teams were really old school as compared to teams from Jakarta who already has implied the modern day cheerleading. But what made me more keen to the performance from Bandung team, One Cheers and T.N.T. is that despite the old school choreography it was just a breathe of fresh air.

Since I have received a big offer to train an elite school next year, I think I might want to inject the Bandung style in the routine. But of course I might need to add some twist in it to make it more Malaysian, and a captivating one. One goal is to win the honours.

Back to the trip, I only managed to go to 3 malls. Citos which is more like Lot10 and Starhill. Then Atrium, a bit like Sg. Wang and lastly again to the Blok M area which is like Kotaraya and the gangs.

I didn't buy much either as I mentioned earlier everything is on tight budget as I want to go back to Bangkok next month. Oh apparently, there would be some friend friends tagging along in this trip. I don't know if this could break or make the trip. I mean I've never travelled in groups, let alone with other PLU's before. One thing, I will not have the privacy requested but then again it is not well planned yet.

I missed Kayrul so much when I was in Jakarta. I called him on the 2nd night I was there, and the best reply was, "Sorry babe, I'm with my bf now."

Kesian kat I...

I'm leaving to Jakarta tonite for 5 days. This trip is an invitation from the Indonesian Cheerleading Community, who would be jointly organising a cheerleading championship with Plaza Atrium (the new mega shopping mall in Jakarta).

Being there as the invited judge would definetly boost my popularity here and there. Ahaks. Nevertheless, I just love doing my job at the same time I would be able to cuci mata for some Indonesian anak ikans.

I don't think I'll shop as much like before, cause I'm a bit tight on this trip since I'm going to Bangkok next month so saving most of my pennies for that instead.

So wish me the best. In a way, I'm carrying the name of our country. Seating as one of the esteemed judges, it's truly the resemble of my hardwork for cheerleading the past years. Phew!